Good Morning,
With another half term out of the way I have come to appreciate how calm my house can be, at times. One of the foster kids went to his Dad’s for the week and the other one kept busy with football, bowling and other arranged activities. My Son’s were busy with work, my wife was busy at work, so I was left alone and undisturbed for most of the week. I have to admit, it was bliss.
I got more reading done, watched a couple of films, went to the gym a few times and, obviously, got my work done. As there was no delivery, for me, last week, I just had some admin, some design work and a few meetings to attend to, but not a great deal of stress – I could get used to this life.
But, as we know, things don’t last forever and life will default back to normal this week. Already, with the one lad returning home from his Dad’s, things have started to ‘ramp up’. I can sense a shift of energy in the house to a more pressured feel and I know this is our ‘normal’ but I did enjoy the relaxed respite, that we just experienced, while it lasted.
When I speak to groups about high performance and maintaining a balance in life, we often uncover that most people do not get enough respite from the daily pressures in life. We don’t really take care of ourselves as we know we should and we have many reasons for not doing what we know we should do.
Wearing the “4 hours a night sleep” badge of honour, or the 14 hour days and taking work home badge and maybe even the 2am emails to clear things from the inbox, badge, is not healthy. People do some strange things for some very strange reasons, all rational to their context but with potential negative side affects.
I realised that, just because we can handle the stresses and strains of life, it’s not a great existence and some things need to change. I have started this week by planning a change in the household. I am going to set and agree some new rules, rules that we probably should have agreed a long time ago but, as life moves along, certain behaviours stick and do not get addressed.
Here is my list of things, we need to agree, to re-balance things:
- If you use the kitchen, clean the kitchen
- You are responsible for your own washing and ironing
- Ask before you take
- If you use the last one (whatever that is) replace it
- Plan your own travel – make sure you can get to places under your own steam
- This is not a hotel so do not expect 5 star service when you do not pay for it
- Always respect the homeowners 😀 hopefully, one day, this will be you
I think most of you will agree, even if you don’t have kids, these are basic rules that get forgotten and, the good nature of a parent / homeowner to tidy, clean, cook, wash and taxi around becomes an expectation or even thought as a misguided right!
By agreeing these, we will be helping our household to become independent, ready for the day we boot them out of the comfortable, warn, free, nest 😆.
Joking apart, it will take the pressure off me and Sandra as we do have day jobs as well.
What small pressures can you identify, that are still taking your time and shouldn’t be, with team members, colleagues, workmates, friends and family that need a new set of rules applying?
How much of your time will you get back if you change a few rules and help people to become more independent?