So last weeks challenge was nothing to do with travel, you will be glad to hear! It came in the form of a house move.
Anyone who has moved house will know how quickly the pressure can build between people.
My Mum has moved from a 4 bedroom detached house, after 30+ years, to a park home to be nearer to the family.
As you can imagine, the space available is vastly different and that did present some issues.
The removals firm, did as they were supposed to, they packed everything!
The new home started to fill up as the endless stream of boxes and furniture arrived. Even after dropping off and filling a storage unit, there was still too much for the space available.
It was a hot day and the lifting and moving was stressful with no end in sight. I had the use of a van to move stuff locally, which helped, but the extra 3-piece suite was becoming an problem. It had been moved on to the driveway, to make space for my Mum’s sofa and chairs, and was still there at the end of the day. I couldn’t just leave it there but it didn’t fit into the van, it was heavy and I was on my own.
My Sister called to check in and see how things were progressing and i was stood in the front room, surrounded by boxes, no-where to move and we were discussing what to do with the 3-piece suite. I felt helpless and was running out of options and my Sister (who was on holiday in a nice place) was making suggestions and I just started to get really angry!
Trudi sensed this and hung up on our conversation! “The body leaks the truth” and I couldn’t hide how tired, frustrated and angry I was – no matter how hard I tried.
After 10 minutes I started to look at options and, before I knew it, the chairs were safely stored in the shed and the sofa was on it’s end in the kitchen, not ideal but dry. So everything was back inside and out of the ‘potential’ rain. The best thing my Sister did was to make me solve the problem and force me to think!
It is the same in business at times. You might manage someone remotely and try to help and support them but don’t really understand their situation fully. So making suggestions, that may actually be the right ones, might just fuel the emotional fire. Rationale doesn’t often prevail when someone is tired, frustrated and angry
Leaving me to deal with this challenge, was the best solution, and I am glad Trudi hung up on me. We could have spent another 30 minutes talking, building up on negative emotions, which wouldn’t have helped.
Emotional Intelligence is something that takes effort. Our brain is designed to help us deal with threats, using our ‘fight / flight’ response, so managing our emotions and being aware of someone else’s emotions, is a skill that can be developed, if only we take the time to do it!
Work in progress for me…….click here for short video that may help